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Ice Cold Fear

Of all the instinctual emotions the deserve to be second guessed—i.e., lust, hunger, blind cooperation with the statement, “holy shit, this milk must be a decade old, smell it!”—fear deserves the most...

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Character Factor

Character attacks, like drive-by shootings and lottery winnings, never seem to go to the right people; sensitive innocents are often used as pawns (and attacked, and tortured) in battles between those...

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Desire Exit

Unless your sexual relationship began with a matchmaker, a bet, or a promise to a dead sibling, it probably started out with the spark of mutual attraction. Being wanted by someone you love is part of...

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Job Affliction

No matter what drew you to your current job—having to pay rent, wanting to fulfill a lifelong passion, being forced step up where no one else can or will—you do the work because it’s got to be done,...

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Family Fuel

All of us suffer from a Cassandra complex at one time or another, where we see something so clearly—from how your brother will regret eating that gas station sushi to why your wife will wish she’d...

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Loss Examination

Too often, people try to apply the koan about a tree in the woods to a mistake in their lives, i.e., if you’re fucking up but don’t acknowledge it, is it really your problem? Unfortunately, the answer...

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Walk Away Glad

Many relationship blow-ups are due to the most fleeting of bad moods; who knows how many divorces could have been avoided if both parties had just been well-rested, fed, and/or not stuck behind that...

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Panic Boon

While fear usually inspires a fight or flight response, there’s also an equally unappealing third choice, “freeze,” which is when you’re too scared to move, explore your options, or even hold on to a...

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Push and Null

Pressuring somebody to care about their self-interest when they’re obsessed with something else is an often foolhardy endeavor, and not just when it comes to trying to rescue people from drugs, bad...

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Learning Swerve

Breaking up with someone is a lot like breaking a bone; if it doesn’t set properly, the bone won’t really heal, so you’ll end up with a nagging pain unless you break it and set it again. With...

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Top Fear

Fear, like high school and colonoscopies, is an uncomfortable-yet-necessary part of life. Problems arise, however, when fear either becomes excessive, thus limiting our life experiences, or...

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No Pro

In a culture that proudly sells medications created by grade school teachers, financial advice by religious figures, and recipes by celebrity wives, being an expert, or just seeking advice from one,...

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Moral Exam

We’ve said many times that the worst relationships teach the best lessons, from what to look for in your next partner to what you need in a good lawyer. Knowing how much you’ve actually learned from...

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Re: Liable Source

Along with avoiding conflict, favoring calm, and having taste that’s too sophisticated to tolerate Michael Bay, human beings are also notoriously bad at correctly placing blame or finding the true...

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Tricking Your Battles

War might be hell, but the decision whether or not to take a fight on can make you feel, at the very least, like you’re Satan’s upstairs neighbor. Sometimes you want to avoid taking necessary action in...

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Doubt on the Town

The sad irony behind most stupid decisions is how much careful, intelligent thinking goes into convincing ourselves that the moronic, often-fearful choice we’re about to make is somehow the right thing...

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Rout of Character

If illness is a painful condition that you don’t choose to bring on yourself, then being an Asshole™ is probably an illness, at least for those born with bad tempers, quick impulses, and no ability to...

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Forced Perceptive

“Sensitive,” like “funny,” “nice,” and “enjoys long walks on the beach,” is one of the many superficially-bland-yet-possibly-dangerous qualities women say they look for in a mate (even the beach thing,...

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The Fault Setting

No matter what the talking heads say, a bleeding heart is not a partisan trait, nor is it always a negative one. You don’t even have to be a registered voter to be a good, caring person, and party...

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Plague of Focus

If focus exists on a spectrum from oblivious to obsessed, you’d be surprised how hard it is to find a happy medium, and how impossible it is to budge your brain if it tends to work at either extreme....

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